Joey's Perfect Girlfriend
by Yami Amethyst Rose
Summary: Five short drabbles of Joey's stupidity ways of getting a girlfriend.
1. Alice

Hehe...I'm going to make Joey suffer. Here's the first drabble of Joey's Perfect Girlfriend!

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Name: Alice Walker

Age: 17

Gender: Girl.

Weight: 158 lbs.

Height: 6'2'

Activities: Swimming, Basketball, Duel Monsters, and Shopping.

Known as: Most popular in Silver Highway Academy, highest in Math.

Hi, if ya don't know me, the name's Joey Wheeler, third best duelist in the world. You wondering, "Why do you have a profile of a girl?" Well, it's because that I need a girlfriend to understand me. I tried to go with the lower approach, but mostly I end up in the dumps. My sis kept tellin' me to find a soulmate. She should find one for herself!

Anyway, I head down to the Academy, and see my target. As soon as I get near her, she just kicked me in the gonads. I can't believe this! Next thing you know, her boyfriend came near me, picked me up, and started the beat the crap out of me. Rule number one: If your target has a boyfriend, just run away. I hear her yell something,

"You come near me, idiot, and you'll never see the day of light ever again!"

When I came home, my sista dragged me into the bathroom, and threw me into the bathtub. It was filled with iodine! My eyes, they burn!!!! What was it that turned my sista evil?! She better be not hanging out with Richboy! After that, I ate almost the whole fridge, and went to bed. My next target was a loner.

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Please, review! 


	2. Sabrina

Thanks you, for reviewing! I agree that was harsh of Serenity, but, it's clue to who Joey gets as a girlfriend. If you want, I can get ideas for the next drabbles from you guys.

Anyway, here's the second drabble!

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Name: Sabrina Walker

Age: 16

Weight: 145 lbs.

Height: 5'11'

Known as: Little Miss Shy, intelligent in Science, Math, and Cooking.

Okay, I'm a bad cook. Just don't tell anybody. Anyway, today was not like the last one. I couldn't believe that my first target already had a boyfriend! I don't know what's with Serenity. Either she hates me, or is it she hanging out with Richboy?! I got a bone to pick with him, but for now, my girlfriend awaits.

I saw her on my way to finally meeting her in the park, but when I tripped on one of my shoes, I landed on her, with our lips touching, and she just scream to somebody.

"Daddy! This guy's raping me!"

Oh crap. I should've know that her father was here. After the big beat-up of my life, I had two black eyes, a broken hand, a twisted ankle, and two kicks to my gonads. I have to limped all the way back home. Rule number two: If your girl with her parents, and they scream rape, run the other way, lock the door of the nearest building, and wait for them to leave.

My sister dragged me into the bathtub again, only this time it was filled with lobsters!! Yeow!! I'll be feeling that in the morning. Where my sista get all those lobsters from? When I wake up tomorrow, I'm having lobster for breakfast.

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How do you like this one? 


	3. Amy

Thanks for some tips for my story. Can you guys give some ideas about who should I start next on my list?

Anyway, here's the third drabble!

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Name: Amy Silver

Age: 18

Weight: 165 lbs.

Height: 6'1'

Physical Description: Blonde hair, white eyes, and sensitive skin.

Activities: Duel Monsters, Badminton, Tennis, and Shopping.

Known as: International Strategy Champion.

Hey, I can use her skills to teach Richboy a lesson! I woke up to find something hurting my butt, and boy was it painful! I don't know why Seren's cranky, but never mind that. First things first, get my girlfriend. I hope she doesn't kick me in the gonads. Seriously, I had enough kicking in that place for Christ's sake.

When I got to her house, I saw her getting undress. But, I tripped over some tin buckets. Stupid buckets! Then, I went to my target, but she was gone. Next thing ya know, I saw her, and she sprayed that pepper stuff in my eyes! I already had the iodine in my eyes, and the black marks to prove how bad my week was going. Then, she did some crazy martial arts moves on me. I ended up with six crushed fingers, a dislocated jaw, and two crushed toes. This girl's gone crazy! Then, you know who came up: my buddy, Yami.

"Joey, why are you in my girlfriend's lawn?"

Crap. Rule number three: If you go after one of your friend's girlfriend, just forget them in your memory, and run away before they start to beat you up for trying to steal their girlfriends.

I only got two more days before I'm at the end of my ropes. Oh no! Here's comes my scary sister! She dragged me into the bathtub again. Now, it was only filled with...Eww!! Stinky diapers! Yuck! Double Yuck!! I'm sanitizing the bathroom and me tomorrow!

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What do you think of that? 


	4. Lilly

Okay, I'm going to follow up on this: Joey, has only two days left before his sister wins the bet that they made. Also, I'm going to reveal why Serenity has been so moody to her brother. You won't believe this at the final drabble.

So, here's the fourth drabble!

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Name: Lilly Powers 

Age: 18

Weight: 175 lbs.

Height: 6'5'

Physical Appearance: Brown hair, yellow eyes, and rough skin.

Known as: The Speed Driver in Driving Races, and the toughest girl in high school.

Man, only two days left until my bet with Seren is done! When am I going to find the girl that's perfect to me before I lose to my little sista? The profile that I had with me involved my most toughest challenge yet. This girl was the toughest girl around her school, Tokyo Highway Institute. Man, do I feel a great connection from her! I'm the toughest boy in my school, and she can get me in a jiffy to school when I'm late. Time to meet my future girlfriend.

When I got to the school, I saw her grabbing some chump and demanding the money that he had. He hesitantly took his money out, and ran to his class before things got worse for him. I show up to her face. Boy, was she tall. Do you know what I said to her?

"Hey there. You know, we both have a connection to being bullies."

"Then, why don't we see who's the toughest person around here?"

That can't be good. She grabbed one of my legs, and started to beat me up. The dust became a cloud as the fight ranged on. Finally, I had two splitting headaches, a broken hand, a lot of lumps on my head, and to make matters worse, my flower boxers were showing from the place that she ripped my pants at. I ran home as fast as I can, but not knowing that a lot of people were taking my picture wearing it. I can see the headlines now: 'Joey Wheeler, the toughest boy at Domino High, was beaten by the toughest girl at Tokyo Highway Institute.' Rule Number Four: If your target is really tough, don't fight her, or you'll end up pretty embarrassed.

I headed to the doctor's to get patched up. Tomorrow was my last shot of finding a girlfriend.

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Don't worry, I plan to finish the story today. Please, Review! 


	5. Mai

Alright, I'll clear up on the ages for you. As yes, Seto Kaiba is going to make an entrance in here.

Mai- 20

Joey- 19

Serenity-17

Seto- 19

Now, here's the answer to all questions to why Serenity's moody! The final drabble!

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Name: Mai Valentine

Age: 20

Weight: 165 lbs.

Height: 6'1'

Appearance: Blonde hair, purple eyes, and silky skin.

Known as: Toughest Female Duelist

This is my last shot. I knew Mai since Duelist Kingdom, and I only recognize her as a friend. I hope that the last few days wasn't going to lose my chance of getting Mai. I was pretty beaten up bad. I mean, look at me! I suffered lot of bruises, few cuts, burnt eyes, broken bones, and my pain in the lower part. This is really going to get me bad notice on campus. I'm heading to college soon, and I look like no presenter to my new superintendent!

I head to the Game shop, and everyone body just started laughing at me. But, you know what, all of a sudden Mai came near me and kiss me.

"Wha' was tha' fo?"

"Silly. You have known by now that I'm was your supposed to be girlfriend. Yami just told me that you were in his girlfriend's lawn."

"But, why is everyone laughing at me?"

"Idiot. Your picture with your boxers was posted on Tristan's Myspace account."

I'm gonna kill Tristan when I get my hands on him. Mai headed to my car, since I was in no condition to drive, due to my injuries during the week. Once we got to my apartment, I started to hear someone talking to my sis.

"Serenity, you know that you have to tell him by now."

"Seto, I just can't. He'll blow."

"I'm willing to take of you and the baby."

Baby? What the?! No way is Richboy in ma House! I tore down the door, and leaped to get Moneybags, but Mai just held me back.

"Let me go! I'll kill him!!"

Serenity stood up, and looked at me. Please, not any of those bathtub 'lessons' again. Her voice was serious, and I could tell my her face that she was ready to tell me something.

"Joey, I have something to tell you."

I stiffed up.

"I have to marry Seto, because...I'm pregnant."

My whole world went black. I have my greatest girlfriend, but now, I'm going to have my worst Brother-in-law.

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Pretty surprising, huh? Please, tell me what you think about the story! 


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